How do you find your soul? Is it the powerful water underneath the ice? What is the soul? The soul is your individual nature.
The other day, I stared at the frozen sea. A layer of ice, a bit of snow on top of it, no waves. You step on the ice and break in. Soon the ice will be thick and cross-country skiers enjoy skiing on the frozen sea. Underneath the ice is deep water.
Mother nature is generous. She provides the sound of the waves, the smell of the salt water, the mirroring of the sun on the water, seafood, and she gives us the ice. Mother nature knows what she does. She shares the sea and ocean with us but doesn’t hand it over to us.
Experts have revealed much about the sea and the ocean. We don’t know everything about it and already lost so considerably.
Your soul is the deep water of the sea within you. Have you recognised the uniqueness of your soul? Do you show and share your uniqueness?
Do you have a layer of ice covering your soul? Who or what has created the ice? Has someone hurt you?
I have pain and I caused pain. Each single time I’ve experienced pain, the layer of ice became thicker. The thicker the ice, the least someone with good or unkind intentions could reach me. Neither could I get through the layer of ice to reach my soul.
Underneath the ice is the pressure of the pain.
Have you ever watched a fisher man drilling a hole in the ice for ice fishing? Once the drill gets through the ice, water comes out of the hole.
Imagine, you get through the layer of your ice. It will lead to stop pushing down the pain. To the surface comes the actual pain. You accept the pain and what caused the pain. The next step is to release the pain. We call this healing.
I believed I had nothing working for myself in the first twenty years of my life. No interests. No talents. No calling. I finished my education, which I chose because there was nothing else. I enjoyed myself going out and socialising. Fair enough. In my early twenties, even that disappeared.
Is it true that I had nothing going for myself? Today, I understand the answer is NO.
My nothing was a lot. I held my head above the cold water while the ice formed and restrained me. I pushed the pain to the bottom of the sea for years. The yelling craft teacher who was hitting and scratching my hands when I sought her help, the catholic priest who scared me talking about hell, dysfunctions at home, and so on.
Does this resonate with you? Have you done it like me pushing down the pain? Pretending all is good on the outside.
A healer entered my life when I saw and understood the layer of ice taking over my life. A psychology student gave me counselling five times a week for many months. I got the help I needed while she gained work experience. The psychology student listened to the calling of her soul on becoming a psychologist. Through the therapy, her soul touched mine.
We worked through relationships, work, family, money, health, and so on. I remember the time when she said to me; you need to find a hobby. That’s when a coworker showed up with a brochure of the Austrian Alpine Club in Vienna with an indoor climbing wall in the city center. His calling was indoor climbing. His soul touched my soul. Off I went to the climbing gym.
I joined a course with a great instructor. When he watched me falling off the same spot again and again, he told me you aren’t thinking. Without thinking, you can’t hold the focus. He was right. I had to think to keep my focus when I placed my toes on a small boulder to push myself up to go further.
When you’re at the point where you tell yourself I’ve nothing going for me, become open to healing. The healers and teachers will find you.
I got into outdoor climbing, hiking, and mountaineering. Passion, love, and excitement. I was one with what I did. I summited the first 4000 m peak in the French Alps the year after I started climbing. Another year went by and I stood on top of Mont Blanc. That day, I focused on taking one step after another, placing my feet right for 22 1/2 hours. Holding the focus for so many hours, I reached the stillness of the deep water inside of me. What I know today is my soul.